Stay at home mums

I've just finished reading Why love Matters by Sue Gerhardt and I found the same considerations as the Continuum Concept on stay at home mums. Essentially that our culture does not allow us to be mothers and workers at the same time. Mothers with new babies often find themselves isolated, at home alone with the children, while partners continue to work. This might only be for the time they are on maternity leave or for longer. For women who identify with their working self, this can be very hard, coupled with the feeling that we are letting "the sisterhood" down by not being a productive member of society. If life is too short to stuff a mushroom how come I'm at home preparing the 100th meal/snack this week?
I feel very fortunate in the sense that I've had a very full life before my children were born, I am not in paid employment at the moment but see this time at home as a chance to catch up on a lot of reading and studying (when the kids are asleep) and I love carrying my baby and taking them both to the park and for walks.
But I can see that for a lot of mothers this isn't the case. We love our children desperately but what about me? The woman that was?
The solution according to both books is to integrate caring for children with a social/working life, in more rural situations the children are expected to be with the mother at all times so there's no such thing as child time and adult time, as she is part of a larger family/community others also take turns in carrying and looking after the babies, older children follow the adults and either engage in the same tasks or play independently. In an ideal society the mother would be able to take her baby to work or to spend her day with other mothers. At the moment the only women who can really do this are the work from home mum or the self employed ones.
A good example is my sister: she runs her own tattoo studio, still carries and sleeps with her one year old who goes to work with her every day, he is now crawling so when she is busy he either plays on the floor or is held by one of the other people who work there.